Sep20

The Rat From Hell

Posted on by
The Rat From Hell

ratThe Rat From Hell met her demise shortly after Howard pulled her out from under the refrigerator, about a week after we returned from France. Next we pulled the refrigerator away from the wall to clean up anything else left behind, but the refrigerator never worked right afterwards. I defrosted it by hand several times but finally called a repairman in September.

She had chewed through a wire so the refrigerator no longer defrosted automatically. Repair bill: $232 and many lost hours defrosting and reading the appliance manual. I did, however, learn where the condenser coils are.

The rat got into the garage on Friday, April 27, a week before we left for France. Claude saw the rat after I entered the house and the garage door was coming down. His instincts kicked in and he went after the rat one second too late. He did not get far enough into the garage to trigger the safety beam that would have stopped the garage door. Claude’s fatal hunting accident was a cat-tastrophy.

I was so upset by the sudden loss of Claude that it took me a couple of days to realize there was a rat in the house. I made sure there was no food available the rat when we left in the hope that it would go away by itself, but the rat nicked the cashews I was planning to take with me and enjoyed them while I was in Paris.

The rat was still in residence when we returned. I got some mousetraps which were too small but klonked her hard enough to daze her. That’s when she hid under the refrigerator.

I did not enjoy cleaning up what was left of the cashews after they had gone through the rat. And I had to throw out a slipcover. It was disgusting and depressing.

Total cost: Claude the cat that we loved, $232 for appliance repair, many hours defrosting and reading the appliance manual, one chewed-through slipcover and few weeks of depression over the creepy ickyness of it. I suppose it could have been worse. I am grateful to Howard for following his hunch to check under the refrigerator. I would not have looked there.

Sep4

Martin Walter: The Dark Vineyard

Posted on by
Martin Walter: The Dark Vineyard

The Dark Vineyard

by Martin Walker

Martin Walker is a senior editor and columnist for United Press International who has turned his clear, journalistic writing to creating absorbing mysteries set in the French countryside — Perigord to be exact. Classmate Russ McCracken from the SRJC class recommended his books and the library lent me book three in the series. I am looking forward to tracking books one and two: Bruno, Chief of Police and The Caves of Perigord

Aug1

Rainy Brain, Sunny Brain

Posted on by
Rainy Brain, Sunny Brain

Author Elaine Fox tells us that Optimism is more than feeling good’ it’s about being engaged with a meaningful life,developing resilience, and feeling in control. Optimistic realists, she says, don’t believe that good things will come if they simply thing happy thoughts. Instead, they believe at a very deep level that they have some control over their destinies.

Often, the control is imaginary, and mildly depressed people have a more accurate understanding that the control is an illusion. But optimistic people seem to attract good luck and good fortune. Is optimism hard-wired or can we create a healthy brain?

“Look on the bright side. I always do,” says Magic Johnson. This is a powerful technique for brain health. Research shows that people who “flourish” experience about 3 good feelings for every bad one. If you want your marriage to be happy, crank it up to 5 good feelings for every negative one.

Other techniques are mindfulness meditation, especially Jon Kabat-Zinn’s mindfulness-based stress reduction techniques. This balances and calms the brain. The Buddhist practice labeling our feelings and treating them as nothing more objects of attention can encourage a sense of detachment.

When there is more activity on the right side of the brain (right-sided asymmetry) there is more of an experienced of stress and fearfulness which produces more cortisol. More activity in the left half of the brain, relative to the right, is related to a tendency to approach good things, while more relative activity in the right half is associated with avoidance of bad things. Brain scans of withdrawn or depressed people typically show higher activity on the right side side. This presents a challenge for left-handed people because the right side of the brain is dominant.

Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction (MSBR), developed by Jon Kabat-Zinn at the University of Massachusetts, is described in Wikipedia as:

… having a variety of very powerful benefits including an increase in the body’s immune system’s ability to ward off disease, a shift from the right prefrontal cortex (associated with anxiety, depression, and aversion) to the left prefrontal cortex (associated with happiness, flow, and enjoyment). Other benefits include a reduction in stress hormones such as cortisol, and an improvement in one’s overall happiness and well-being in life.

Author Elaine Fox also explains the physiology of people who maintain their composure in the face of stress. They have more and better connections between the prefrontal cortex which moderates and tamps down a jangling amygdala which enables them to have a “very long fuse.” They are slow to anger and they calm down quickly after they are upset. They also tend to have a wider circle of friends, enjoy higher status and earn more money.

In contrast, people with an overactive amygdala and limited connections to the more thoughtful prefrontal cortex behave more like Donald Duck. They appear over-reactive and coworkers and others tend to avoid them or “walk on eggshells” around them. They have fewer friends and earn less.

Overall, the book was optimistic that people can choose to think good thoughts and shift their outlook to a positive one in which they feel they have control over their lives and the outcomes of their actions. Recommended

Jul10

Traveling With Others Is Challenging

Posted on by
Traveling With Others Is Challenging

Paris Bus 69I was talking with some French classmates and Russ recently returned from a 3 week trip with his partner, Claire, and her brother and his wife from Des Moines. Claire is fluent in French and plans carefully, as do I. Russ said, “I just drive. She tells me where. It works out.” So my hypothesis is that planners typically pair with spontaneous people because, as Russ said, it works out.

I am lucky that my first trip to Paris was 50 years ago. It was a gift from my very devout Godmother who took me to every church in Paris. And London. And Rome. And then we went to Lourdes for the Feast of the Assumption on August 15. Along with every other devout Catholic on five continents. But I was 15 and I learned a lot.

My second trip was when I was 21 and I spent my time shopping. Spent every penny I had. It was great but just a few days because I didn’t have many pennies.

Nine years ago I went back to Paris with my sister Peggy who is an artist. We spent all our time in the museums. Four days. Louvre, d’Orsay, Pompidou, Rodin. plus another four days in London just seeing art (Peggy used to live in London). I was finally satisfied with Impressionism. It is fun going to museums with someone who loves and understands art and is enthusiastic about hiking to one more gallery.

It is a drag going to museums with someone who wants to be “on vacation.” Because the art in the Louvre is mostly naked ladies, I made sure my husband saw Venus deMilo and the ancient Roman and Greek (naked) statues and the magnificence of the palace. But he was brain dead after six hours. The crowds and jet-lag were hammering us.

Paris Musee de l' ArmeeI kept it down to one museum a day and made sure he got plenty of good food (easy). He got one “free” day while I went shopping so he went to the Army Museum. He just paid the day rate because it was cheaper than getting a Museum Pass that spanned our whole visit. The lines are not long at the Army Museum. Where the pass really comes in handy is skipping the lines at the Louvre, Pompidou, etc. He really liked the Army museum, especially learning that “Detail” is the name of the artist who painted battle scenes in what we now call “great detail.” [Or maybe that’s what the museum put under the images and he misinterpreted it as the artist’s name. You never know.]

I guess Russ and Claire were guiding her brother and his wife on their “big trip” and Russ was exasperated by their Des Moines attitude. He said, “They didn’t understand why everyone didn’t speak English!”

Frankly, I was afraid my husband would be the same way, but he plunged in with enthusiasm, buying “billets” at the metro as soon as we arrived. So I will plan a longer trip that includes Versailles and the Dordogne. Russ went to the Dordogne and saw the caves. I have not seen any of his pictures and I am eager to hear the details of his trip. He loved Bruges.

People who have been subjected to the Devout Catholic stuff may be less enthusiastic about the religious grandeur of some sites. Howard climbed the steps at Notre Dame. His photos of the gargoyles and the roofs of Paris are breathtaking. I skipped it because I thought the climb would be breathtaking. [huff-huff]

My idea of “spontaneous fun” in Paris is getting on a bus and seeing where it goes, especially at rush hour when you get to see what people wear to work. You have time to look in all the shop windows when traffic is slow. If you have a Pass Navigo, you can hop off and hop back on. Do lots of window shopping from the comfort of your bus seat.

Jul10

Compass of Pleasure

Posted on by
Compass of Pleasure

The jaunty subtitle is: How our brains make fatty foods, orgasm, exercise, generosity, vodka, learning and gambling feel so good. I skipped the gambling chapter in this library book, and many of the other chapters looked brand new but the pages on orgasm were well-worn, with the corners dog-eared and worn off. Hmmm.

This book was more technical than I expected, and less focused. I was hoping for some transcendent prediction or behavior guideline but got nothing more than an imagined “baseball cap of happiness” by the last chapter. Humph. Many science fiction books predict far more pleasurable brain stimulation practices in the future.

Nevertheless, his excruciatingly detailed explanation of some research I had seen summarized elsewhere helped me to understand why a blunted dopamine pleasure circuit might drive compensatory overeating. This lends credence to Michael Pollan’s assertion that “the banquet is in the first bite.”

David Linden does an excellent job of explaining how addiction works. The ancient Greeks were right: Moderation in All Things. Binging on something (chocolate, alcohol, sex) turns “liking” into “wanting,” then “craving.” He describes how it lights up the brains of humans, monkeys and rats. Binging on substances (including food) or activities (sex, gambling) changes the brain by downregulating the dopamine receptors. Too much happy-juice burns out a few of the circuits.

But wait! There’s more. If addiction is defined as craving and you get it by binging, is that the same as “physical dependence?” Nope. You can crave booze without actually having the DTs.

Physical dependence is created with a zillion small hits, like nicotine and caffeine. When you are physically dependent, withdrawal can lead to depression, lethargy, irritability and the inability to derive pleasure from other activities. No wonder people tend to substitute a new addiction (like daily running) for an old one (like daily drinking).

He is crystal clear about the importance of genetics in being addiction prone and he describes the different kinds of inheritable dopamine systems. Here’s a quote:

One tantalizing observation concerns the gene for the D2 subtype of dopamine receptor, a crucial component of the pleasure circuit. A particular form of this gene, called the A1 variant, results in reduced expression of D2 dopamine receptors within the nucleus accumbens and the dorsal striatum. Carriers of the A1 variant are, as a result, significantly more likely to become addicted to alcohol, cocaine, or nicotine. Furthermore, among alcoholics, those with the A1 variant tend to be more severely affected, with earlier age of drinking onset, more severe episodes of intoxication, and more unsuccessful attempts to quit. In families with a strong history of alcoholism, brain scanning has revealed that those family members who were not alcoholics had more D2 receptors in the nucleus accumbens and the dorsal striatum than those who were. Taken together, these studies suggest that elevated levels of D2 receptor may be protective against certain forms of drug addiction.

So, if you get more pleasure out of it, you consume less? Maybe it is time to more fully appreciate that the banquet is in the first bite…

Jun30

Gone Girl Starring Nick and Amy Dunne

Posted on by
Gone Girl Starring Nick and Amy Dunne

Gone Girl Gillian FlynnGone Girl by Gillian Flynn is #2 on the best seller list and is the best book I’ve read since “Unbroken” by Laura Hillenbrand. It is a first-person story told by two different people — that’s new! It is both a mystery and a thriller. And best of all, the two main characters are named Dunne!

You will keep turning the pages of “Gone Girl” because something mind-boggling happens in every chapter. I love the way the surprises keep coming; unexpected and yet completely logical. Amy is the rich-girl daughter of two psychologists (now THAT will make you crazy!). The parents made their fortune writing children’s books about their mythologized daughter “Amazing Amy.” And Amy IS amazing. You will be amazed at how amazing Amy is by the end of this book. You will wonder how any child who was mythologized by her parents could be any other way.

Both Nick Dunne and Amy Elliott Dunne are writers by trade, and I wondered how this was going to come together. It does, at the end. Marriage is a dicey prospect for two people in the same field of endeavor because competition rears its head in unpredictable ways.

I am recommending this book to any friend contemplating divorce.

 

I just saw the movie

Gone-Girl-movie
Oct. 29, 2014 Gillian Flynn got sole credit for the screenplay and I would love to find out who really wrote it. Reese Witherspoon produced it and it would have been a great role for her 10 years ago. This images is both the opening and closing shot of the film.

It isn’t very often I think the movie is better than the book (“Bridges of Madison County” comes to mine) but this was great. Especially the line near the end, “I’m the cunt you wanted so bad you pretended to be better than you are.

The movie gave me a much better understanding of the motivations of Nick and Amy Dunne when, near the beginning, she said in a voice-over, “I don’t want to be the kind of wife that dresses you up in a monkey suit to parade in front of her friends.” And his corresponding thought was, “I don’t want to be the kind of husband who treats his wife like the Highway Patrol — always hiding from her, trying to outwit her.”

Now I am going to think about the role of Denial in a relationship, and how We Want What We Want.

Jun15

Was French Class Worth It?

Posted on by
Was French Class Worth It?

A friend from New York asked about the French lessons I was taking to prepare for our trip to Paris. There is a myth in the US (I heard it again while we waited to board the plane) that all French people speak English, they just won’t because they are stubborn.

Sarkozy Election PosterThat’s as nuts as saying all Texans speak Spanish. According to Wikipedia, about 35% of French people speak English but the statistic is misleading. International business people (like Christine LaGarde, head of the IMF) speak English, so do upper class intellectuals in France (just as the upper class in the US speaks French). Nicholas Sarkozy could not speak English well when he was elected President of France. I don’t know if the newly elected president does either. He only spoke French when I saw him on TV exulting in his victory over Sarkozy. Oh, wait! I was watching TV in Paris… on their Election Day 6 Mai.

It is important to remember that the French HATE the English. Remember the Hundred Years War? It lasted 300 years — that’s how long they were fighting. Napoleon was planning to invade England until the battle of Trafalgar in 1805.

I didn’t meet Christine LaGarde (though I would love to — I copy her hairdo) I mainly spoke to waiters, passers-by on the street and security guards. I needed to ask directions and understand the answers like how to find the correct bus stop, or where Howard would exit Notre Dame after he visited the towers. I could get a recommendation at the wine shop and buy delicacies. For example:

Rue Cler is lined with cafes, bakeries, chocolate confectioneries, ice cream parlors and what New Yorkers call “appetizing shops.” Each has a different specialty such as pâté or thousand-leaf pastries filled with delicate ham and cheese. They are bustling in the late afternoon and filled with the local people.

One we visited had an aisle down the middle with the cashier at the end. The prepared food was in a case on the left and ingredients were over a counter on the right. I asked for a slice of cheese, a couple of thick slices of country bacon and some olives from a big French guy rapidly serving people over the counter on the right. My hands full, I was propelled by the press of people to the cashier at the back, a well groomed woman in her fifties. She asked in French if this was everything I wanted.

I looked longingly at the little quiche in the case on the left. She said “La quiche?” I nodded. She was already out of her chair and heading for it when she said, “Combien?” “Une,” I squeaked.

She wrapped it up and returned to her chair as the line pressed behind me and I churned through my mental rolodex. “Je suis desolee de votre derangement,” I stammered, knowing it wasn’t quite right. “Je vous en prie!” she scoffed and rang up the purchase. I was so relieved that she thought it was natural to help people get what they wanted. I realized that is was probably her family store and the men slicing ham and cheese were her sons.

The food was sensational and it was really nice to have something to eat in the apartment when we came home wet and tired.

Knowing some French really makes a difference. In Paris, yes, and even more in the countryside. And the difference it makes is the quality of your experience. You will have SO much more fun if you can understand the waiter when he says, “Oh, don’t have that. Everyone has this.” Just know that he will say it in French.

Jun15

Four Hour Body by Tim Ferriss

Posted on by
Four Hour Body by Tim Ferriss

I slogged all the way through this book to the end, page 474, and found on the last page has a quote by Alan Kay. “The best way to predict the future is to invent it.” The book I read on the plane back from Paris was ABOUT Alan Kay and, frankly, it was more interesting.

I like Tim Ferriss. I read all his books. I visit his websites. I have watched a real-time webinar with him. I saw him speak at WordCamp. But, I gotta tell you, this is the most self-absorbed guy I have seen in a long time. I typed in many of the web links he lists at the end of chapters and the ones that start with FourHourBody.com all seem to be affiliate links. That is, every one goes to a retail site where you can purchase the item he touted in a way that provides a financial kickback to Tim Ferriss. The book is a big affiliate marketing technique! I gotta hand it to him — this is a new one on me.

The information in the book was interesting but conflicting. He includes in an appendix a long essay on self-experimentation by Dr. Seth Roberts that recommends no breakfast and much saturated fat like bacon. The weight lifting diet he shows has no corn, beans, tomatoes or carrots. It is just dark green leafy vegetables (presumably for fiber and calcium) and lean protein. And the perfect posterior model does her exercises BEFORE breakfast contrary to the paleolithic diet he recommends. Well, I have been trying it for a few days and so far, it seems to trigger migraines.

Jun6

Lizz Free Or Die – Lizz Winstead

Posted on by
Lizz Free Or Die – Lizz Winstead

Lizz Free Or DieLizz Winstead, a comedy writer on the team that created the original “The Daily Show”, grew up in Minnesota as a progressive in a conservative Catholic household. Her series of “messays” (messy essays) shows how it shaped her ambition. As the youngest, she was the family comedian. I always wondered what happened to Catholic girls who grew up in a relatively happy and safe family. It looks like this one drove herself too hard, became very angry and hard to work with, burned out on a couple of important jobs, and developed writers block.

How very interesting! I thought all this only happened to people with unhappy childhoods! But no, Lizz talks about how “Lizzilla” developed and breathed fire not only on the job, but on her Moroccan vacation. Lizz got a lot of pushback as her early career evolved from ordinary girl humor to political humor but she got a luck break to develop a daily TV show of satirical news reporting. The bad news is: they made her the head of the writing team and she had no experience with (1) TV or (2) leading a team of writers. As she tried harder, she got more stressed, her jokes got meaner and she got gone before Jon Stewart arrived.

It was hard to make a living afterwards, but she finally landed a job on Air America, the new liberal radio network that was supposed to counter Rush Limbaugh and Glen Beck. Problem was: (1) she did not hide her scorn for the network’s owners and (2) she didn’t know radio. On the plus side, she persuaded a talented radio personality from Northampton, Massachusetts to move to NYC to join their network. Rachel Maddow.

I liked Lizz’s writing and her inventiveness with language. I certainly agree with her anti-Catholic politics. I think she might have been a casualty of the “you can have it all” myth that was going around in the 70s and 80s. It took her a year longer than she expected to finish the book because it was so hard to stay focused when she was simultaneously trying to write comedy routines.

I understand feeling scattered and I wish I blogged more. Sigh.

Apr28

Claude Is On The Roof

Posted on by
Claude Is On The Roof

I am so sad. Howard came home about 20 minutes after I did. I was of course sitting at the computer. We had spoken by phone about 30 minutes before so I knew he was on the way. I had received his call in my car, just before I got home.

I was so tired, trying to get everything ready before we left on our trip. I parked in the garage and walked around behind my car as I always do. The cat was in the driveway, rolling around on his back like a little roly-poly. I scratched his tummy. He was waiting for Howard to come home. I got my stuff out of the passenger side and went inside to take care of the accounting things.

About 10 minutes later Howard was at the front door saying “Oh, no. Oh, no” He unlocked the front door, dropped his packages and raced to the laundry room. I went out the front door to see what the matter was.

The garage door was going up, retracting from the dented Claude. It had struck him right behind the front legs, instantly stopping his heart. He had been one instant too slow to trigger the safety beam.

We buried him in the back yard in the spot pictured above and placed a bright stone to mark the spot. We are sad.